[Steven arrives later than usual with a bunch of nervous energy. While Harrow doesn't seem like a total threat he knows the man is manipulative and deceptive, and he can easily get to the people Steven and Marc love. Hell, the fact that he knows their secret...
He lets himself in through the front door and locks it behind him, even though Hawke usually doesn't, before calling out:] It's me.
[Steven smiles at Montoya's greeting, reaching down to pet him and let the mabari lick his hand. When Hawke approaches, he's happy to take hold of the tea and lean into him, instantly comforted despite his nerves.]
Let's sit. Can we sit first? [He sighs, holding the mug up to his nose to savor the calming, familiar chamomile.] God, why would Thirteen...
[He trails off with a grumble before going to sit on the couch.]
I'm probably overthinking this but this man was... unwell. Very unwell. I don't know that his mental state has changed much since I last saw him either, and with how Thirteen brings people about at any point in time, who knows how much he's changed? Probably not at all. He seemed just as infuriating as ever.
[ Hawke waits for Steven to sit before he sits down next to him and puts a protective arm around his shoulders. He hasn't seen him this riled up in a bit. Whoever this man is, he's gotten under his skin. ]
Who is this man? [ He is going to try simple questions interjected between Steven's rambling. He doesn't want to overload his lover who is already having some trouble making sense.
Or maybe it's another one of those things where Hawke does not understand. ]
[Steven leans into Hawke's side and doesn't mind when Montoya comes over to rest a head on his knee too, clearly sensing the nerves.]
Right- sorry- I'm a little frazzled. [A deep breath.] His name is Arthur Harrow. Back home he was-... well, a bit of a self-righteous arse. More importantly, he was the leader of a cult that believed they could "heal" the world by judging people's souls. Those who didn't pass their test were killed.
[He's trying to explain this as basic as possible because he knows it will only confuse Hawke further, but he's also trying to be honest.]
In any case, Marc, Layla, and I were trying to stop him. We did stop him. We couldn't save everyone in time but... [He looks up at Hawke, the worry clear in his eyes.] He knows about Marc and I - who we were and why. He's the kind of man who would use any information possible to hurt others, slowly and sneakily, like a snake. He acts like he's a good man but even I don't know if he has any good left in him anymore.
[ Hawke gently runs his fingers through Steven's hair while he talks simply taking in the information. Oh, he gets a little angry so his wings warm a bit but he doesn't fly into a rage.
He hates cults. He hates that this man would hurt Steven. All his protective instincts are triggered and he wants to stop this man right away. ]
Well, we can't kill him. He'll come back tomorrow. [ He sounds genuinely disappointed they can't do that. ]
I assume you don't want to post something to the network warning people? Because we could simply undercut him by speaking out.
Giving him attention is exactly what he'd want. He'd use that against us. It would only serve as fodder for blackmail, I'm sure. Best thing is to ignore him, I think.
I'm telling you because you're... important to me, and you know the kind of things we've been through. [Steven reaches for Hawke's leg and squeezes it affectionately.]
He is dangerous in a way that isn't all physical. If he knew your weak points he'd use them against you, and with trials being what they are, who knows if and when you may run into him against your will.
This place already uses my weaknesses against me. [ He shrugs. ] A person doing it is no different than Thirteen.
[ Perhaps he should be more worried but Hawke does really think turning into a bear and mauling the man could solve a lot of problems if the man makes problems. ]
I am forewarned thanks to you. I'll be careful if I do run into him. [ He presses a kiss to the top of Steven's head. ] I can always lean on my... primitive world and lack of modern understanding if he tries to talk to me. It's fairly effective at ending conversations.
[ Or derailing them. Hawke isn't very devious but he can occasionally be clever. ]
Probably for the best. To be honest, I don't know what he'll do while here. Maybe he'll keep to himself and all this worrying is pointless. He's just a man but words can be very powerful tools.
[Steven sips from his tea and smiles a bit, feeling better immediately telling Hawke like this rather than him running into the man first. Harrow confuses Steven to this day in ways he is wholly uncomfortable admitting.]
Back home, he did have a source of power from the gods - similar to my suit, yeah? I don't know if Thirteen would give that to him or if it's something he could also purchase one day. [He squirms with discomfort at the thought.] If we can own weapons, why can't he, right?
[A sigh.] I'm afraid you're probably right about that.
[Another calming sip of tea and he reaches out to pet the soft fur on top of Montoya's head. That always soothes him.]
I hope so. Marc doesn't need the stress he brings either - the reminders of what he's done. [He pauses again, hesitating, because he isn't sure if he should share more. At the same time, Steven promised to be honest, and he trusts Hawke more than anyone from the people he met in Folkmore.]
I'm sure Marc will handle the problem in a more direct way. [ His tone is dry and just slightly sarcastic. That way, he expects, will be to punch Harrow in the face and threaten bodily harm. ] And I trust he'll do anything to protect Layla though she doesn't need it.
Hm? What else? [ Montoya is good at sensing stress and wants to help. He keeps his chin on Steven's knee and leans into his touch. ]
I think she'd join in, really. [A soft chuckle, because while Steven is not a violent person, he understands why Harrow would infuriate anyone enough to get a punch in the face. He has quite the punchable personality.
Steven worries his lip for a minute as he tries to figure out how to explain this without upsetting Hawke, but there really is no good way about it...]
Harrow technically... erm... killed us. Marc and I. [He shifts hands to squeeze Hawke's leg again instead.] But we survived as well. It's a long story. Layla and Khonshu saved us.
[Much as he hates to admit the bird god did anything to help them, he can't deny that.]
But no, he very much shot us with full intent of ending our lives, and it worked... for a while. It's hard to be remorseful for a man who was so quick to get rid of us simply for getting in his way.
[ Now Hawke's wings do flare with a surge of bone deep anger. The sort of anger Hawke's felt only a few times in his life. Like the explosion at Kirkwall. Like listen to Danarius talk about Fenris as a possession. Like Meredith lecturing him on the danger of mages.
Oh, this Harrow has made an enemy in him. Hawke doesn't care about anything else. This man, no matter what, will see no sympathy or empathy from Hawke. Ever. ]
I don't think he deserves an bit of your remorse or pity or time of day. Let him rot here.
[It's the kind of reaction he expected and although he doesn't want Hawke to go after Harrow, it felt important for him to know how far the man was willing to go once upon a time. Perhaps even more so in a realm where death is not permanent and consequences seem limited.
A selfish part of him likes knowing that Hawke would be so upset on his behalf, so protective.]
I know. He really doesn't but- [But what? There's no good way to end that thought and Steven knows it.
He sighs again, tipping his head back against Hawke's arm as he gazes at the ceiling.]
It's strange. I would never thank him for it, obviously, but death brought Marc and I closer together. I learned the truth about myself. Everything I was kept in the dark about for so long. I... don't know if Marc would have ever explained it all to me had we not died. I know that sounds so bonkers.
[ The anger lingers a bit but his wings settle down. They won't be overwhelmed by the heat of them. Looking at Steven's handsome features helps as well. ]
Oh, it's absolutely insane. [ There's nothing about this that sounds reasonable or rational or logical. Hawke is amused by that. ] But this place is also insane so what's the difference really?
[ He shrugs. ] You did come back to life, right? You weren't brought here from some afterlife? Because you said you stopped him?
[ Hawke believes that Steven would've told him about being dead when they were revealing deep truths to each other. ]
You're not wrong there. [He laughs some under his breath because Folkmore really is insane in a lot of ways. Steven strongly thought so since the moment he arrived a little over a year ago.]
Yes, we came back to life. It's a long story but we had to reunite with Khonshu, serve him again... [Steven has explained Khonshu and his powers to Hawke before, or at least done his best to.] But for a while... we were in the afterlife. A version of it at least. Seeing and experiencing that was-... it's changed my perspective on so much.
[He squirms in a little closer to Hawke.]
I don't know if the Chantry teaches anything about that? Do people in Thedas believe in life after death?
Hawke hums for a minute as he tries to think of how to explain it. He listened to Chantry teachings, of course, when he was younger but he's not theologian or anything.
"There's a realm beyond the Fade where souls go when we die to rest by the Maker's side," he explains. "That's the best we've got for an afterlife."
It's really the best he can offer. Hawke isn't a fan of the Chantry and he suspects he won't be going to the Maker's side when he dies. Mostly because of all the blasphemy.
"There used to be the Golden City but once Tevinter Magisters walked in that things were ruined."
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And nothing will keep me from you.
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bad memories
I'll explain better face to face.
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But trust me.
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He lets himself in through the front door and locks it behind him, even though Hawke usually doesn't, before calling out:] It's me.
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[ Montoya would've alerted him if there was a stranger coming to the door. Instead the mabari just runs up and goes to snuggle against Steven's leg.
Hawke even has a cup of calming tea for him. He presses it into his hands as soon as he's close and also presses a kiss to Steven's forehead. ]
Now, tell me what's got you so rattled about this man.
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Let's sit. Can we sit first? [He sighs, holding the mug up to his nose to savor the calming, familiar chamomile.] God, why would Thirteen...
[He trails off with a grumble before going to sit on the couch.]
I'm probably overthinking this but this man was... unwell. Very unwell. I don't know that his mental state has changed much since I last saw him either, and with how Thirteen brings people about at any point in time, who knows how much he's changed? Probably not at all. He seemed just as infuriating as ever.
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Who is this man? [ He is going to try simple questions interjected between Steven's rambling. He doesn't want to overload his lover who is already having some trouble making sense.
Or maybe it's another one of those things where Hawke does not understand. ]
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Right- sorry- I'm a little frazzled. [A deep breath.] His name is Arthur Harrow. Back home he was-... well, a bit of a self-righteous arse. More importantly, he was the leader of a cult that believed they could "heal" the world by judging people's souls. Those who didn't pass their test were killed.
[He's trying to explain this as basic as possible because he knows it will only confuse Hawke further, but he's also trying to be honest.]
In any case, Marc, Layla, and I were trying to stop him. We did stop him. We couldn't save everyone in time but... [He looks up at Hawke, the worry clear in his eyes.] He knows about Marc and I - who we were and why. He's the kind of man who would use any information possible to hurt others, slowly and sneakily, like a snake. He acts like he's a good man but even I don't know if he has any good left in him anymore.
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He hates cults. He hates that this man would hurt Steven. All his protective instincts are triggered and he wants to stop this man right away. ]
Well, we can't kill him. He'll come back tomorrow. [ He sounds genuinely disappointed they can't do that. ]
I assume you don't want to post something to the network warning people? Because we could simply undercut him by speaking out.
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Giving him attention is exactly what he'd want. He'd use that against us. It would only serve as fodder for blackmail, I'm sure. Best thing is to ignore him, I think.
I'm telling you because you're... important to me, and you know the kind of things we've been through. [Steven reaches for Hawke's leg and squeezes it affectionately.]
He is dangerous in a way that isn't all physical. If he knew your weak points he'd use them against you, and with trials being what they are, who knows if and when you may run into him against your will.
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[ Perhaps he should be more worried but Hawke does really think turning into a bear and mauling the man could solve a lot of problems if the man makes problems. ]
I am forewarned thanks to you. I'll be careful if I do run into him. [ He presses a kiss to the top of Steven's head. ] I can always lean on my... primitive world and lack of modern understanding if he tries to talk to me. It's fairly effective at ending conversations.
[ Or derailing them. Hawke isn't very devious but he can occasionally be clever. ]
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[Steven sips from his tea and smiles a bit, feeling better immediately telling Hawke like this rather than him running into the man first. Harrow confuses Steven to this day in ways he is wholly uncomfortable admitting.]
Back home, he did have a source of power from the gods - similar to my suit, yeah? I don't know if Thirteen would give that to him or if it's something he could also purchase one day. [He squirms with discomfort at the thought.] If we can own weapons, why can't he, right?
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[ There's no stopping anyone from getting all sorts of nasty magics and magical items. If this Harrow wants them, he imagines he'll get them. ]
There is always the chance he is so busy dealing with the same Trials we are that he won't have time to trouble you or Marc.
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[Another calming sip of tea and he reaches out to pet the soft fur on top of Montoya's head. That always soothes him.]
I hope so. Marc doesn't need the stress he brings either - the reminders of what he's done. [He pauses again, hesitating, because he isn't sure if he should share more. At the same time, Steven promised to be honest, and he trusts Hawke more than anyone from the people he met in Folkmore.]
There is something else.
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Hm? What else? [ Montoya is good at sensing stress and wants to help. He keeps his chin on Steven's knee and leans into his touch. ]
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Steven worries his lip for a minute as he tries to figure out how to explain this without upsetting Hawke, but there really is no good way about it...]
Harrow technically... erm... killed us. Marc and I. [He shifts hands to squeeze Hawke's leg again instead.] But we survived as well. It's a long story. Layla and Khonshu saved us.
[Much as he hates to admit the bird god did anything to help them, he can't deny that.]
But no, he very much shot us with full intent of ending our lives, and it worked... for a while. It's hard to be remorseful for a man who was so quick to get rid of us simply for getting in his way.
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[ Now Hawke's wings do flare with a surge of bone deep anger. The sort of anger Hawke's felt only a few times in his life. Like the explosion at Kirkwall. Like listen to Danarius talk about Fenris as a possession. Like Meredith lecturing him on the danger of mages.
Oh, this Harrow has made an enemy in him. Hawke doesn't care about anything else. This man, no matter what, will see no sympathy or empathy from Hawke. Ever. ]
I don't think he deserves an bit of your remorse or pity or time of day. Let him rot here.
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A selfish part of him likes knowing that Hawke would be so upset on his behalf, so protective.]
I know. He really doesn't but- [But what? There's no good way to end that thought and Steven knows it.
He sighs again, tipping his head back against Hawke's arm as he gazes at the ceiling.]
It's strange. I would never thank him for it, obviously, but death brought Marc and I closer together. I learned the truth about myself. Everything I was kept in the dark about for so long. I... don't know if Marc would have ever explained it all to me had we not died. I know that sounds so bonkers.
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Oh, it's absolutely insane. [ There's nothing about this that sounds reasonable or rational or logical. Hawke is amused by that. ] But this place is also insane so what's the difference really?
[ He shrugs. ] You did come back to life, right? You weren't brought here from some afterlife? Because you said you stopped him?
[ Hawke believes that Steven would've told him about being dead when they were revealing deep truths to each other. ]
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Yes, we came back to life. It's a long story but we had to reunite with Khonshu, serve him again... [Steven has explained Khonshu and his powers to Hawke before, or at least done his best to.] But for a while... we were in the afterlife. A version of it at least. Seeing and experiencing that was-... it's changed my perspective on so much.
[He squirms in a little closer to Hawke.]
I don't know if the Chantry teaches anything about that? Do people in Thedas believe in life after death?
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"There's a realm beyond the Fade where souls go when we die to rest by the Maker's side," he explains. "That's the best we've got for an afterlife."
It's really the best he can offer. Hawke isn't a fan of the Chantry and he suspects he won't be going to the Maker's side when he dies. Mostly because of all the blasphemy.
"There used to be the Golden City but once Tevinter Magisters walked in that things were ruined."
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